Archive for May, 2010

Dealing with Stress

Monday, May 31st, 2010

What do you do when you feel stressed? Perhaps you brew a cup of coffee or steep a cup of tea and then steal away for a few minutes of silence. Maybe you play praise and worship music. Perhaps you treat yourself to a massage or pedicure, go for a walk, or phone a friend.

Or maybe you have a meltdown and yell things you later regret (been there). Maybe you procrastinate, hoping that putting off the inevitable will magically fix the problem. Perhaps you go to bed and try to sleep the stress away.

The reasons for our stress and the ways in which we deal with it vary with our personalities, backgrounds, and circumstances. Personally, when I’m feeling stressed, it’s usually caused by one of two things: work overload or concern for my family members.

When it’s my workload, I’ve usually dealt with it by writing out my daily to-do list and then asking God to enable me to accomplish the tasks that matter most to Him. However, my load has increased dramatically over the past couple of years as International Messengers Canada has grown. And so, I’m learning how to take practical steps to deal with the stress that’s accompanied it.

For instance, I’ve recently released three commitments. One meant ending a 10-year writing career with a Christian publication. This was particularly painful because I’ve enjoyed it so much, but I’m sensing God say “Let it go.” Streamlining hurts but it will enable me to evaluate and focus on the projects that God seems to be bringing my way now and to be most effective there.

When it’s my family, whether immediate or extended, I tend to feel more anxious inside. I wake up in the wee hours of the morning and lay awake trying to shove the what-ifs aside. It takes a lot of energy to refuse to entertain those fearful thoughts and to turn them to prayers instead, but expending that energy is necessary for the sake of my mental, emotional, and physical well-being.

This weekend I realized something negative about my response to stress. That is – I tend to tell others about how busy I am and how tight my schedule is. Where’s the benefit in sharing that information? Maybe there’s a subconscious something hoping to gain a pat on the back or a comment like, “Oh, poor you.” At any rate, I feel like the Holy Spirit has poked me with His finger of conviction and shown me that this is an area in which I need to grow. If you’re reading this and I’ve done this in your presence, please forgive me and hold me accountable next time I start to whine, okay?

The biggest help I’ve found in dealing with stress of any kind is to make a priority of spending time with God in His Word. That’s where I find my refreshment and strength. The Psalmist could identify. He wrote, “As pressure and stress bear down on me, I find joy in your commands” (Psalm 119:143).

God’s Word continually reminds me of His sovereignty, His power, His wisdom and His unfailing love. Focusing on His character and promises brings me hope and cheer. Remembering who He is and that He’s more than able to do exceeding abundantly above anything I could ask or imagine brings me confidence. Like the Psalmist, I find joy in His commands.

How about you? How do you deal with stress? Do you have a particular Scripture that’s been helpful in dealing with stressful situations?

Obedience and Spiritual Well-Being

Friday, May 28th, 2010

Obedience to God is vital to one’s spiritual growth and effectiveness. Without it, we’re like a brittle bush, stunted and unfruitful. I know. I’ve been there. That’s how my spiritual life felt for a year while I tried to persuade God that He was wrong in asking me to write Moving From Fear to Freedom.

Thankfully He didn’t let up. He persisted, His finger of conviction pointing straight at my rebellious attitude every time I opened my Bible or tried to pray. When I finally agreed to do what He’d asked me to do, I experienced a surge of physical strength and mental creativity that lasted until the manuscript was complete.

I also experienced the thrill of seeing God change my ideas along the way. I’d written a list of women whose stories I hoped to include in the book, but each time I started a new chapter, He’d bring someone else along whose testimony was even more relevant. Every day was a new journey that led me into a deeper understanding of His adequacy, and that understanding has enabled me to say yes more readily to other assignments.

The more spiritual birthdays I celebrate, the more I believe that obedience to a believer is like water to a potted plant. With it, we flourish. Without it, we shrivel up. Psalm 119 is loaded with insights about it. Here are some to ponder:

“Give me understanding and I will obey your instructions; I will put them into practice with all my heart. Make me walk along the path of your commands, for that is where my happiness is found” (Psalm 119:34,35).

“I will keep on obeying your instructions forever and ever. I will walk in freedom, for I have devoted myself to your commandments” (Psalm 119:44,45).

“Your decrees have been the theme of my songs wherever I have lived. I reflect at night on who you are O LORD; therefore, I obey your instructions. This is how I spend my life; obeying your commandments” (Psalm 119:54-56).

Good stuff, eh? These words make obedience sound like a good thing rather than something to be done with gritted teeth. Imagine – we experience joy and freedom when we do what God says. What a concept!

I can relate to the Psalmist. I choose to spend my life obeying God’s commandments. That’s not always easy. Sometimes doing so interferes with my own plans. Sometimes it requires sacrifice of time, energy, and money. Sometimes it means doing something I just don’t feel like doing. But I’m getting smarter in my old age, and I know that it’s necessary for spiritual growth, fruitful living and for overall peace with God. What can beat that?

What’s your story? What’s your take on obedience and its importance to your spiritual well-being?

Back to the Basics

Wednesday, May 26th, 2010

Sometimes we, as followers of Jesus Christ, complicate our faith. Corporately, we bog down in theological discussions and get hung up on church politics, sometimes splitting our congregations over issues of little consequence. Individually, we strive in our own strength to please God and then berate ourselves when we fall short. We wander through wilderness experiences sometimes because of our own choices, and we question God’s presence when the going gets tough despite His repeated promises to never leave us.

What’s with all that? Maybe it’s time to get back to basics.

John 15 is one of my favorite Bible passages. In it, Christ speaks passionately with His disciples. He knew His death was only hours away, so He didn’t waste His breath chattering about this and that. He addressed the issues that really matter.

Christ repeated a particular word numerous times in this passage: remain (NLT). Some versions translate it as abide. Regardless of the translation, it’s obviously a key concept or He wouldn’t bring it up over and over again. Here are a few insights I’ve been pondering about this word as it relates to my relationship with Him…

  • How does a person remain in Christ’s love? That’s an easy answer – by obeying His commands. “When you obey my commandments, you remain in my love, just as I obey my Father’s commandments and remain in his love” (v. 10).

Obeying Christ means doing what He’s told us to do – loving other people, aligning our thoughts with what’s    right and true, refusing to gossip or life, maintaining a life of sexual purity, giving thanks in all things, and so forth. Obeying Him means we acknowledge Him as our Lord. He’s at the steering wheel; we’re not. We’re cooperating with Him rather than fighting against Him. That’s how we remain in Him. Simple, eh? 

  • What are the blessings given to those who remain in Christ? There are several, and they’re all incredible. First, they live fruitful lives (v. 5). The means by which that’s accomplished differs from person to person, but the end result is the same – they impact others for eternity. Second, they can ask anything they wish from God and He’ll answer their prayers (v. 7). Their hearts will be so in tune with Him that their requests will reflect His priorities and desires, therefore, their prayers are guaranteed an answer. How sweet is that? Third, they experience overflowing joy (v. 11). No matter what life brings, they know joy because they know and trust Jesus with the details.  And last, they enjoy friendship with Jesus (v. 14). Imagine that – friendship with one who’s all-wise, all-powerful, always faithful, and always loving. It doesn’t get much better than that!

This is just a snippet of the goodies in John 15. My blog word count can’t do it justice, but  hopefully I’ve communicated the essence of Christ’s message when He taught the disciples about what really matters. If we, as individual believers, get back to spiritual basics and make it our personal goal to remain in Christ, everything else falls into place.

Any thoughts? What insights do you have from this passage? What practical steps do you take to remain in Christ?

Believe it or Not, God’s Still in Control

Monday, May 24th, 2010

Later today I’ll meet Dan and Laura Sawatzky, a couple whose story I just completed for Power for Living. Dan went on a 2-week mission trip to Brazil in 2008 to build a church alongside several career missionaries. While there, he was involved in a near-fatal motorcycle crash. He was air-ambulanced back to B.C. where he contracted a “super-bug” in the local hospital. As a result, his recovery suffered major setbacks and he was unable to work for eight months (he was a self-employed contractor).

As I listened to Dan and Laura describe their harrowing experience, I realized how easy it might be for them to question God’s sovereignty in their lives. And yet, they maintained confidence that God had directed Dan to Brazil. They acknowledged His hand in every detail of the trip, and they expressed gratitude for His being in control despite how out-of-control the circumstances may have appeared.

King David understood God’s sovereignty, too. 2 Samuel 7:18-29 records his prayer to God; the words Sovereign LORD appear seven times (NLT). This knowledge of God’s character enabled David to respect Saul even when Saul hunted him like an animal. How easy it would have been for David to kill Saul and assume the royal throne, but he refused to step ahead of God’s timing. He respected Saul and waited to become king because he trusted God’s sovereignty over the details of his life.

What a great example for us! When difficulties come, it’s easy for us to get upset or to whine about life not being fair. It’s easy to retaliate against those who hurt us. It’s easy to act impulsively to try to calm our fears (I remember nearly leaving our year-round Christian camping ministry to find a “real” job when we ran into major financial setbacks). But really…if God is indeed sovereign over the details of our lives, then peace and confidence ought to be our trademarks.

Next time you feel afraid or angry at your circumstances, ask God to show you whether they’re the natural consequences of something you shouldn’t have done. If so, ask Him to forgive and grant the wisdom and grace necessary to move forward from that point. If not, praise Him for being the Sovereign Lord and choose to believe that He’s in control of your destiny.

How have you seen God’s sovereignty in your life?

What to do When Your World Caves In

Friday, May 21st, 2010

I’ve spoken at two women’s retreats this month, and oh, the stories I hear. Obviously, for confidentiality’s sake, I can’t go into detail about them. But I can say that women carry huge burdens….

Some are battling cancer or watching their loved ones fight the disease. Others tell of their husband’s unfaithfulness or of them leaving the marriage completely in pursuit of other women. Some are struggling with not being able to conceive, while others are angry with God because He’s planted them in a place or position where they would rather not be. The stories go on and on. My heart hurts for each woman, especially those mired in resentment. Thankfully they are few, for the majority want to move forward and experience God’s rest and blessing. Trouble is, many times they’re in basic survival mode and simply don’t know what steps to take. If that’s your position, or if you know someone who’s there, here are a few strategies based on the life of David.

David’s story is found in 1 Samuel 29 and 30. He was heading into battle with the Philistine army when several army commanders expressed their disapproval of his presence. They felt he was a risk; he might betray them during battle and defeat them rather than the enemy. King Achish disagreed but he wanted to appease the commanders, so he told David to take his men and return home. David obeyed. Upon his arrival at Ziklag, he found the city burned and plundered. All the women and children, including his two wives, had been kidnapped.

Imagine the scene. David and his men had traveled for three days without food or water. They were exhausted, and now they were faced with their loss. Scripture says they wept until they could weep no more. As if that weren’t enough, David’s life was now in danger because his men blamed him for the disaster and threatened to stone him. Things couldn’t have looked more bleak. How did he respond in the face of a terrible, no-good, very bad situation?

 * David found strength in the LORD his God (30:6). When our world caves in, we, too, can find strength in the Lord. That means focusing on God’s promises and presence rather than on the difficulties we face. That often requires a sheer act of our will, a deliberate turning of our attention to Him rather than to the what-ifs and our discouraging or frightening circumstances.

 * David prays (v. 8). What a great example! In the midst of emotionally charged situations, we sometimes say or do things we later regret. We react based on impulse and get ourselves into deeper trouble. We can avoid such mistakes by taking a moment to pray for God’s direction.

* David perseveres (v. 10). One third of his army was too exhausted to chase the enemy so they stayed behind while David led the remaining soldiers into battle. The men were physically and emotionally spent but they pressed on knowing that God had promised victory.

David’s world caved in but he found hope. The same can be true for you. Do as David did – find strength  in the Lord, pray, and persevere. And you, too, will not only survive, but thrive.

What practical strategies can you share with others who are experiencing crisis today?

God Bends Down

Wednesday, May 19th, 2010

Hi friends! I spent the weekend in Winnipeg, speaking at a women’s retreat for The Meeting Place.

Manitoba sunset

Had a fantastic time with 80 precious women! Spent Monday morning doing two interviews with Willard Thiessen for “It’s a New Day” 

Grace and Willard Thiessen

 and the afternoon training a lady who plans to minister in the Ukraine with IM this summer. Returned on Tuesday afternoon. Home sweet home. And now, back to my blog…

The Scriptures contain some amazing visuals about God and His character. Take Psalm 116:1-2, for instance. These verses say, “I love the LORD because he hears my voice and my prayer for mercy. Because he bends down to listen, I will pray as long as I have breath.”

Picture this! You and I are mere specks among the billions populating the earth and yet God knows us intimately. When we cry out to Him, He recognizes our voices amidst the din. His infinite love for us causes Him to respond by bending down and listening to us.

I liken this to an attentive, loving parent. He/she might be in the middle of performing an important task when his toddler suddenly cries out. The parent drops what he’s doing and rushes to the child’s rescue. When he reaches the toddler, he kneels or bends down to get closer and to hear the youngster’s words.

Thinking about God, my heavenly Father, bending down to listen to my concerns brings me huge encouragement. That visual reminds me that He cherishes me and values relationship with me. It also reminds me that He’s never too busy or too far removed to hear my heart’s cry.

This insight is timely for me. Right now I’m feeling a wee bit stressed wondering how I’ll accomplish several major tasks before heading overseas on July 1. The thought of God bending down to listen to my concerns and prayers for help replaces my stress with a sense of inner calm.

What does it do for you?

Pray First; Act Later

Friday, May 14th, 2010

What’s your usual response when faced with major decisions? Do you rush ahead or do you take a moment to ask God for direction? I’ve love to say that my usual response is the latter but that wouldn’t be totally true. All too often I’ve rushed forward only to regret not seeking God first. In one case, that nearly resulted in marrying a guy that would have been the worst possible life partner for me.

King Saul did the same thing. Well, not quite. His situation wasn’t about marriage. It was about war (hmmm…sadly, some people might say that is the same thing). 1 Samuel 14 tells of a battle between the Israelites and the Philistines. As the day draws to a close, Saul isn’t ready to quit. “Let’s chase the Philistines all night and plunder them until sunrise. Let’s destroy every last one of them,” he says. His men replied, “We’ll do whatever you think is best.”

Here’s the part that grabs my attention: “But the priest said, ‘Let’s ask God first’” (v. 36).

Yeah for the priest! His words are loaded with wisdom for those of us who tend towards being impulsive and doing whatever we think is best, especially when our emotions are involved. They tell us to slow down. To pray first and act later. To do things God’s way rather than doing whatever makes the most sense in the moment.

Granted, sometimes the necessity for split-second decisions doesn’t give us the luxury of spending hours or days in prayer. When that happens, a basic “Help, God!” works well. We can trust the Lord to guide us at all times when our hearts are in tune with Him on a consistent basis.

We can apply the priest’s counsel to every aspect of our lives. For instance…

  • If someone hurts us and we’re tempted to retaliate, it’s wise to ask God for His thoughts about our proposed plan of action.
  • If we’re presented with a wonderful new opportunity, it’s best to ask God if saying yes is truly what He wants us to do and if we need to give up something else before assuming a new responsibility. 
  • If we’re fed up with the hassles of our present situation, it’s best to ask God for His insights before bailing out or trying to remedy them our way.

Next time you’re faced with a decision, take the priest’s advice to heart. You might be tempted to do whatever seems best in the moment, but ask God first. He’ll guide you in the way you should go.

What’s been your usual response when faced with a major decision? How has praying first proven to be a smart thing to do?

Fear and the Storms of Life

Wednesday, May 12th, 2010

What’s with the fear issue? Seems that’s all I read about when I open my Bible these days. Maybe God’s trying to tell me something, ya think?

Yesterday I read about sailors whose ships were tossed to the heavens and plunged to the depths. These men cringed in terror, reeling and staggering like drunks. The storm drove them to their wits’ end where they cried, “Lord, help!”

And He did. “He calmed the storm to a whisper and stilled the waves. What a blessing was that stillness as he brought them safely into harbor!” (Psalm 107:26-30).

Several years ago I wrote a “Drama in Real Life” story for Reader’s Digest. I interviewed two men who’d survived a fishing boat accident off Vancouver Island. My blood ran cold as they described the storm they’d encountered at sea – howling winds and frigid waves that towered several stories high, tossing their boat like a bathtub toy and eventually sucking it beneath the water’s murky depths. The men’s terror matched the sailors’ fear as expressed in the Psalms. So did their cries for help.

It’s not only sailors at sea who experience storms that leave them at wits’ end. Landlubbers do, too – homemakers, office professionals, clergy, teachers, nurses, students, single moms….the list goes on indefinitely. I know several women my age and younger who are battling end-stage cancers right now. I know others who are reeling from marriage breakups or staggering under the weight of their kids making lousy choices with lifelong consequences. They’re at their wit’s end and crying, “Lord, help!”

And He does. Sometimes He calms the storm immediately; sometimes not. But regardless of the wind and waves of our circumstances, He can calm the storm that rages in our minds and our emotions.

The enemy of our souls wants to keep us entrenched and immobilized by fear. But God wants to fill us with courage, to calm our anxious thoughts, and to set us free from fear’s power. Every time I feel afraid, I call, “Lord, help!” I remind myself that His love for me never fails. I find courage in remembering His faithfulness to me in the past, and I find peace in reciting truth such as, “God has promised to never leave or forsake me, and He’s bigger than any storm I will ever encounter.” My circumstances might not change immediately, but I experience a blessed stillness within.

Have you experienced a storm in life? If not, I want to know your strategy for storm evasion. If so, how did you survive?

On the Count of Three

Monday, May 10th, 2010

Hubby and I have been caring for our wee grandkids (ages 13 months and 2 years) since last Thursday. That said, there’s no blog today. Meet me here on Wednesday as usual, okay?

In the meantime, here’s a great thought by Jack Hayford: “If I am walking inthe simple path of God’s will for me, I can never be conquered by anything. I may be down, but I’m not out. He will get me up again, and He says when it will be — on the count of three.”

I love it!

Mother’s Day Musings

Friday, May 7th, 2010

Before writing Moving From Fear to Freedom, I conducted a survey of approximately 350 women ages 19-80. According to results, a woman’s #1 fear is the fear for her child’s well-being. One woman said, “I’m not even a mother yet, and already I’m afraid for my child’s safety.”

It’s not just concern for their physical safety that causes anxiety, although heaven knows there’s plenty of reason for that. I recall the days when protecting my little ones from falling down stairwells, straying into a busy street or swallowing something that could choke them obsessed me. That was nothing compared to the anxiety I felt when they started driving alone and when they left home following high school graduation.

Thankfully my kids and I survived their childhood and teenage years. Now they’re in their 20s and becoming parents themselves. I love them dearly and I’m proud of who they’ve become. There’s only one problem – I still wrestle with fear for my children’s well-being. What if they flounder financially? What if they struggle with relationships? What if they make poor choices that will affect them negatively for the rest of their lives? What if they’re treated unfairly in the work place? What if they lose their passion for Jesus? What if, what if, what if….

Once upon a time, I raced to protect my kids from danger. If they fell and scraped a knee, I could give them a kiss and fix the owie. Now I can’t do that. They’re adults and making their own choices. They’re not obligated to ask for my advice, and I’m wise not to offer it too freely. So what’s a mom to do?

Here’s a verse that’s ideal for mothers who can relate to what I’m feeling: “Those who fear the Lord are secure; he will be a refuge for their children” (Proverbs 14:26). What a great promise! It reminds me to keep my focus on God for therein lies my ability to move beyond my fears for my kids’ well-being. He is my security no matter what circumstances my family faces. It also contains a promise for my children.

God promises to be their refuge. He invites them to run to Him, to pour out their hearts to Him and to find their needs met in Him. He’s their source of wisdom and strength. He loves them unconditionally and knows the big picture surrounding their lives and His purpose for them.

Granted, your kids and mine have free will. They can choose to find their refuge in Him or to run the other direction. That’s where our prayers come in. There’s nothing I pray more than for God to instill a healthy fear of Himself within my kids’ (and grandkids’) hearts. I know life will go much better for them if they view it with an appropriate understanding of who God is.

Perhaps your kids are struggling in their spiritual lives. Making God their refuge isn’t even on their radar. If so, do not lose heart. Keep your focus on the Lord and find your security in Him. Thank Him that He’s promised to be a refuge for your children. Keep asking Him to instill a reverential awe for Him within their hearts. And may He fill you with hope and joy in knowing that He is more than able to fulfill His Word.

Do you have a special promise or prayer that relates to your kids?