January « 2011 « Grace Fox

Archive for January, 2011

Whose Perspective Do I Have?

Monday, January 31st, 2011

How must God feel about my perspective on my circumstances? Does He smile because I see them through His eyes? Or does He grieve because I see them through a limited, human lens?

Take today, for instance. I have a gazillion things on my to-do list because we’ve been out of town for 14 days in January. I’ve been waiting all weekend to attack this list, outlining my week’s schedule so I can meet deadlines. Trouble is, I woke this morning doing battle with a bronchial bug of some sort. A couple hours later, a phone call came, telling me about the death of a family friend. A wonderful unplanned Skype call with a missionary friend from Romania followed. Then an unexpected business call sent me down a two-hour detour. And so it goes.

Looking through my human lens, I see I haven’t deleted a single item from my well-organized to-do list. The lack of checkmarks make me feel like I haven’t accomplished anything today. But maybe I’m seeing it all wrong. Maybe I’m fulfilling exactly what God intends for today, and I simply need to adjust my perspective. Can you relate?

Having God’s perspective is so important. I see that in Matthew 16:22,23 where Peter reprimanded Christ for talking about His upcoming death. “Heaven forbid, Lord…this will never happen to you,” he said.

How did Jesus respond? “Jesus turned to Peter and said, ‘Get away from me, Satan! You are a dangerous trap to me. You are seeing things merely from a human point of view, not from God’s.’”

Yikes! Those are strong words. It’s obvious that Jesus isn’t impressed when we allow our human perspective to overrule God’s purposes. He’d much rather that we see life through God’s eyes because doing so enables us to fully engage in what He’s doing.

What circumstances are you dealing with right now? As you think about them, ask yourself whose perspective you have. If you’re seeing them from a human point of view, invite God to tweak your sight. As I look at my to-do list with its lack of checkmarks, I think I’d better do that right now.

Tags: lens, perspective, Romania, to-do list
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Fear of God versus Fear of Man

Friday, January 28th, 2011

In kids’ language, we call it peer pressure. In Christianese, we label it fear of man. Different terms that mean the same thing. It’s all about buckling in our behavior in order to achieve man’s approval or acceptance. What are some examples of falling into the fear of man?

A coworker pilfers office supplies for personal use but we refuse to speak up because, after all, we have to work with her and we want to make that as easy as possible.
A married girlfriend is getting emotionally involved with a guy she met online. We don’t say anything to her because “it’s none of our business.”
We refuse to practice hospitality because household organization isn’t our strong point. We’d rather not let anyone in for fear they’ll think less of us.

I’m sure you can think of other examples; the list is endless. But here’s one that tells the flipside, when the fear of God won over the fear of man. Do you remember when Pharaoh commanded the Hebrew midwives to kill all the Hebrew newborn males? (Exodus 1) He issued the edict because he viewed the Hebrews’ growing population as a threat to his power. He expected the midwives to obey him as dutiful slaves ought, but they refused. Why? Because they feared God more than they feared him.

Exodus 1:17 says, “But because the midwives feared God, they refused to obey the king’s orders.” What enabled the women to respond this way? They understood God’s character. They knew He was a righteous God who valued human life, and they were not about to defy Him by killing babies. They also knew He was bigger than Pharaoh and could defend them if they chose to act in a way that honored Him above the earthly ruler.

I’ll bet they also knew Pharaoh could kill them for their disobedience. But that real danger wasn’t enough to deter them from honoring God first. They feared Him more than they feared the wrath of an angry king. ‘Way to go, girls!

How did God respond to them? “So God was good to the midwives, and the Israelites continued to multiply, growing more and more powerful. And because the midwives feared God, he gave them families of their own” (vv. 20,21). Obviously God likes it when we choose to honor and trust Him.

Who do we fear more? Whose blessing do we value more? Whose approval means more? God’s or man’s – it’s our choice.

Can you think of more examples that demonstrate the fear of man in real life?

Tags: acceptance, approval, fear of God, fear of man, household organization
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The Woes of Wrong Assumptions

Wednesday, January 26th, 2011

Our road trip through Alberta has ended. We’re thankful for safe travels on icy and drift-covered roads. Sorry for not posting on Monday, but it was a crazy day with flying home, restocking the house with groceries, attending small group, and more. It’s good to be home and back in my office! Here’s today’s devotional thought.

Have you ever experienced a relationship conflict as a result of wrong assumptions? I have. I’m in the middle of one right now. It all started during a phone conversation last month. The woman who called told me about her adult son’s poor eating habits. I listened and then told her about my husband’s mealtime habits during his college years.

“Gene claimed he had a balanced diet,” I said. “One dinner consisted solely of baked potatoes. The next day he ate corn. On the third day, he ate a pork chop. By the end of the week, he’d eaten something from each food group. Voila—a balanced diet.”

Our conversation continued on a congenial note for a few minutes, and then we hung up. Two weeks later the same woman sent me an email. My words about Gene’s so-called balanced diet had offended her. She questioned my intention for speaking them. She assumed that I was (1) trying to change the subject, diverting her attention to something other than her son’s issues or (2) making light of her concern for his well-being.

The woman’s assumption floored me. I emailed back, explaining that I meant neither; I simply told a story. As of yet, she hasn’t responded, and I’m left in a quandry.

Negative assumptions are deadly for relationships. What causes us to form them? I believe we jump to wrong assumptions for several reasons:

We fail to listen well and miss important information necessary to form an accurate conclusion.
We’re insecure and therefore misjudge other people’s motives toward us.
We’re overtired or overstressed and therefore unable to connect the dots properly.
We have a guilty conscience.

I suspect insecurity as the culprit for the woman’s wrong assumptions in this situation. What a shame. As I ponder what to do, I find encouragement in knowing that others have dealt with wrongful assumptions, too. Take Joseph, for instance.

Joseph’s brothers sold him into slavery when he was a teenager. A couple of decades later, they were stunned to learn he was Egypt’s second-in-command and their welfare rested solely on him. For years he treated them very well. But when their father died and was buried, they became fearful. “Now Joseph will show his anger and pay us back for all the wrong we did to him,” they said (Genesis 50:15).

Did you catch that wrong assumption? Joseph is going to do us harm now that Dad’s gone. Nothing was further from the truth. Their guilty conscience skewed their reasoning. They assumed the worst about Joseph’s character, trembled with fear, begged for mercy and forgiveness, and offered themselves as their brother’s slaves. Imagine the mental and emotional energy wasted, all due to wrong assumptions.

How did Joseph respond? With sorrow and kindness. Sorrow because his brothers doubted his character even after all the goodness he’d shown them. Kindness because he loved them. I can relate to his feelings somewhat. At this time, I feel sorrow because this woman doubts my intentions and ultimately my character. As time passes and I figure out what to do, I pray that my response will be marked by understanding and kindness.

How about you? Have you ever been the target of wrong assumptions? If so, what insights can you share with the rest of us?

Tags: guilty conscience, insecurities, relationship conflict, wrong assumptions
Posted in Devotionals | 4 Comments »

There’s Something Different about You

Friday, January 21st, 2011

A girlfriend and I were sitting at my kitchen table, talking about recent challenges our families had experienced and how we’d handled them. Conversation paused for a moment, and then she said, “There’s something different about you. What is it?”

I felt like a dream had come true. Her question was one I’d always wanted to hear for it provided a natural invitation to talk about having a relationship with God through Jesus Christ.

Scripture says believers are to be like salt, creating spiritual thirst in unbelievers’ lives. We’re also to shine as lights in the midst of the darkness around us. This happens when we walk in right relationship with Jesus, reading and obeying His Word and allowing Him to conform us to His image. It occurs when we respond to negative situations with peace and show compassion to those who hurt. It happens when we show kindness to those who treat us unfairly and when we walk in integrity even when no one’s watching. When we reflect Christ’s attitudes and actions, others notice a difference.

Joseph’s life caused others to see a difference and ask questions, too. His wisdom and God-given ability to interpret dreams raised Pharaoh’s curiosity. At one point, Pharaoh turned to his officials and asked, “Can we find anyone else like this man so obviously filled with the spirit of God?” (Genesis 41:38). What an incredible testimony to Joseph’s example!

How do others view us? Do they see a difference in us? When they look at our lives, do they recognize that we’re filled with the spirit of God? I pray so!

If unbelievers see no difference in our lives, then we’d best ask God to show us what needs to change. Let’s pray that He’ll work in us so others will thirst for Jesus.

Tags: compassion, dreams, Joseph, wisdom
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Yearning for Approval

Wednesday, January 19th, 2011

Enjoy this Alberta sunrise with me!

How much of our behavior is influenced by a yearning for others’ approval and acceptance? Genesis 28:6-9 makes a fascinating study in this regard.

Isaac had expressed his disapproval of Canaanite women. “Don’t choose your wife from this group,” he’d warned his son, Jacob. Jacob listened to his dad’s advice and left the country to find a life partner from among his uncle Laban’s daughters (28:1,2)

Enter Jacob’s brother, Esau. He knew the warning Isaac had given to Jacob, and he knew Jacob had heeded the advice. That meant trouble for him. You see, Esau had married a couple of Canaanite women. When he realized his father’s obvious dislike of his wives, he must have felt like he’d messed up and fallen from his dad’s favor. How did he respond? He ran out and married a cousin, doing exactly what Isaac had commanded Jacob to do. Interesting, eh? His yearning for approval influenced his behavior.

My hunch is that many men and women do the same thing today. We long for others’ approval so we do things we might not do otherwise. For example, we choose a career based on someone’s approval rather than on our passions. We sacrifice moral standards to secure someone’s favor. We marry someone based on others’ favorable opinions about this person rather than on our own feelings toward him/her. We even dress according to others’ approval rather than according to our personal tastes in fashion, color, and modesty.

What’s at the root of this behavior? An inaccurate understanding of God’s great love and unconditional acceptance. Think about it. If we truly grasped His love, we’d feel completely fulfilled and cease striving to earn man’s favor.

Esau undoubtedly yearned for his father’s favor. Marrying a cousin—someone upon whom Isaac smiled—was his method of obtaining it. Can you relate in some way?

Tags: acceptance, approval, Esau, Jacob, modesty
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Monday, January 17th, 2011

Humans are an interesting study. We’re especially good at spiritualizing sin to justify getting something we want. Jacob’s story is a great example.

Jacob’s brother, Esau, was destined to receive the family blessing. Trouble was, mother Rebekah favored Jacob and wanted him to receive the blessing instead. And so she and Jacob devised a plot to get what they wanted.

Isaac asked Esau to hunt wild game and then cook a meal for him with the catch. He promised to bestow the blessing on him after he’d eaten. When Esau left the house, the devious duo put their plan into action. Jacob killed two young goats and Rebekah prepared a delicious meal. Then Jacob disguised himself as Esau and delivered the food to his dad before Esau returned.

Isaac must have felt somewhat suspicious for he asked, “How did you find the game so quickly?” Jacob replied, “The LORD your God put it in my path” (Genesis 27:20).

Huh? God did what? Not according to what’s written in my Bible.

Jacob and his mom so desperately wanted the blessing that they spiritualized their sin of deception. Their story happened many generations ago, but the same thing happens today. For example, I’ve heard married people involved in adulterous relationships say, “God wants me to feel happy so He put this man/woman in my life.” Truth be told, they’re trying to spiritualize their sin to justify their behavior.

I recently heard about a group of believers who meet weekly to watch X-rated movies. They call it their “small group curriculum.” Here’s their logic: “By watching what unbelievers watch, we’ll better understand their thinking so we can engage them in discussion about spiritual values.” Their means to accomplishing a desired end is ludicrous. They’re spiritualizing sin to the nth degree.

Here’s one more example. We’ve heard of certain televangelists who ask their constituents to send funds to expand their ministry. Truth be told, the money isn’t building God’s kingdom; it’s expanding their personal kingdoms thanks to spiritualizing their sin of greed.

When we take our eyes off Jesus and place them on something or someone we want more, we can easily begin to spiritualize our sin. The human imagination knows no end in this department, so let’s be on our constant guard.

Can you think of more examples about how we spiritualize sin?

Tags: adulterous, greed, spiritualizing sin, televangelists
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Snowy Edmonton

Sunday, January 16th, 2011

I missed Friday’s post due to traveling and not having wireless access. Here’s the winter weather we encountered enroute to Edmonton and in the city. We’re saw oodles of accidents and are thanking God for safety.

#2 highway northSnowy streets in Edmonton. It's -35 degrees C. Brrrrrr.

Tags: Edmonton, snowy
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Stalked

Wednesday, January 12th, 2011

Have you ever felt stalked? By Scripture, I mean. It’s been happening to me for the past 10 days or so. The same verse keeps poppin’ up—first it appeared on the perpetual calendar by my kitchen sink. Then during a phone interview, dripping with a sweet southern drawl, when a 16-year-old North Carolina girl quoted it to me. Two days ago it appeared in my Bible reading for that day.

This verse feels as familiar as my well-worn blue jeans. So familiar, in fact, that I’m tempted to brush it aside and ask God for something more…you know…flashy. But a little voice inside says, “Listen up! God’s trying to tell you something and you don’t want to miss it.”

What’s the verse? “Trust in the LORD with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take” (Proverbs 3:5,6).

The Scriptural stalker offers simple but sound advice. I’m taking it to heart, applying it to my writing and speaking ministry. Here’s why: Nearly four years ago an editor told me to write another book on the heels of my fourth release to keep the marketing momentum going. He wanted a proposal submitted within weeks. Business-wise, this seemed a smart strategy. Personally, it seemed enough to put me over a physical and emotional brink because events at home had hit an all-time pressure point.

My eldest daughter’s wedding was only two weeks away. We were planning to move in six weeks and still had to find and buy a house. Moving meant downsizing and packing our belongings. To top it off, we were on the verge of launching a new ministry. Besides trying to figure out how to do that, we were scheduled to travel to Eastern Europe within six days of our move in order to attend a staff conference.

At first, I caved to the editor’s request. Several days later, I regretted saying yes. Writing a quality book takes time and energy, and I had little of either to invest into a new project. And so I reneged on my decision and told him that the proposal would have to wait. Was that a smart business decision by human standards? Probably not. But everything inside me screamed to let it go and focus on other things at hand.

Over the past three years, I’ve invested into International Messengers’ growth and repeatedly asked God to direct my writing. My understanding says that, in order to best accommodate our growing overseas ministry demands, I should forget books and write only magazine articles. They take less time and energy, they don’t require the marketing effort and expense that books require, and they don’t necessitate having a literary agent. Besides, I’ve submitted three book proposals only to have them rejected. And yet, God has confirmed in several ways that book writing is still in my future.

Since Proverbs 3:5,6 has begun stalking me, I’ve turned it into a prayer asking God to help me (continue to) trust Him with my writing future. And you know what? Some incredible doors appear to be opening. More than ever, I’m acknowledging His presence and sovereignty in my writing life, and I’m expecting Him to direct my path. Now there’s a sense of anticipation, wondering how this verse is going to play out.

You’re probably well-familiar with Proverbs 3:5,6, too. How has it impacted your life?

Tags: book proposals, magazine articles, Proverbs 3, stalker
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When God’s Ways Boggle Human Logic

Friday, January 7th, 2011

Have you ever wrestled with God’s ways not making sense? Honestly, sometimes I shake my head at how He boggles human logic.

My last blog told the story of how God directed our family away from a lucrative position and lakefront home to a year-round Christian camp. My husband worked there as an intern for one year, during which time we received no income. When the internship ended, the director asked us to join fulltime staff and gave us the go-ahead to raise our own support. Our income, for our family of five, would depend on donors from that time forward.

Months passed. Our financial support team grew little by little; our anxiety grew by leaps and bounds. How will we pay our bills? we wondered. How can we afford dental care and orthodontics? Eyeglasses? Proper footwear for the kids? Ferry tickets? Insurance? Groceries? Gas?

While we fretted, God worked behind-the-scenes. One day Gene received an update about an investment he’d made while receiving an engineer’s salary. His eyes nearly popped when he read the statement. He ducked into his office for a moment, studied our financial records on the computer, and then returned to where I waited in the kitchen. “You’re never gonna believe this,” he said.

Turns out, we’d spent $12,000 from our savings during our internship with no income. Guess how much the investment gained during that period? Exactly $12,000. The revelation bolstered our confidence in God’s ways. I’ll bet He smiled as we gasped at His goodness.

Fifteen years later, we’re still living on faith support and watching God provide. It’s been quite a journey. We no longer try to decipher His strategy. We’re convinced He wants us to trust Him rather than a particular methodology.

Abraham and Sarah also wrestled with God’s ways. Abraham laughed in disbelief when God promised him a son through Sarah. He asked, “How could I become a father at the age of 100? And how can Sarah have a baby when she is ninety years old?” (Genesis 17:17,18) And Sarah? She laughed silently to herself when told she’d bear a son within a year. She asked, “How could a worn-out woman like me enjoy such pleasure, especially when my master—my husband—is also so old?” (Gen. 18:12)

God answered their doubts with His own questions: “Why did Sarah laugh? Why did she say, ‘Can an old woman like me have a baby?” Then came the clincher: “Is anything too hard for the LORD?” (Gen. 18:14)

The outcome to Abraham and Sarah’s story answers the latter question with a resounding no. Our family’s history does the same. My journey has taught me that God’s methods defy human understanding. Nothing stands in His way when He wants to accomplish a specific purpose or fulfill a promise. Nothing.

Perhaps you sense God asking you to trust Him for something specific, something big today, but fear holds you hostage. My word to you is this: Surrender. Don’t try to decipher God’s ways before saying yes. Human logic is short-sighted. Believe that nothing is too hard for the Lord, do what He’s asked, and then watch out! He’ll boggle your mind.

Any insights you’d like to share?

Tags: Abraham, human logic, investment, surrender
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