Posts Tagged ‘fear of inadequacy’

Comparison Trap

Friday, June 4th, 2010

Do you ever compare yourself to other people? C’mon, be honest. I’ve fallen into that trap a few times, and guess what? It’s not a comfy place to land.

Author John Ortberg addresses the problem of comparison in his book, If You Want to Walk on Water, You’ve Got to Get Out of the Boat: “I must ruthlessly refuse to compare my talents with anyone else. Comparison will lead to pride and a false sense of superiority if I’m ahead of someone, and misery if I’m behind. Or worse, I will discount and bury the irreplaceable treasure that the Lord of the Gift has given to me alone…I must come to identify, cultivate, invest, prize, and enjoy the gifts that have been given to me. The Lord of the Gift is very wise. He knew exactly what he was doing when he created you. He is well-pleased that you exist. He has entrusted to you everything you need to fulfill the purpose for which you were created.”

I use that quote when I teach about overcoming the fear of inadequacy, and I find its simple wisdom a good reminder to keep my focus where it needs to be – on God alone. The moment I look around and start comparing myself and my lot in life to others, my perspective blurs.

Peter’s outlook blurred in John 21:18-22. Jesus had just finished telling him by what kind of death he would glorify God and commanding him to “follow me” when he turned around and looked at John. “What about him, Lord?” he asked.

You’ve gotta love Peter. And you’ve gotta love Jesus for the answer He gave: “If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? As for you, follow me.”

What a wise nugget, eh? God has a plan for each of us, and only He knows both the minute details and the bigger picture. Our focus needs to be on Him, listening to His voice and following that plan for our lives. The moment we start comparing our path with another’s, we step into a trap that leads only to discontentment, jealousy and envy.

Next time I find myself falling into that nasty trap of comparison, I’ll remember Jesus words and apply them to my situation: “If I want so-and-so to do (or have) such-and-such, what’s that to you? As for you, follow me.”

Any other sage words about avoiding the comparison trap?

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The Power of a Little Word

Friday, January 22nd, 2010

The word but is neither fancy nor flowery. It’s not loaded with visual imagery. Used alone, it neither stimulates the senses nor sends imaginations soaring. Nevertheless, it’s packed with power and ability to change the direction of our lives.

Take Joseph for instance. When Pharaoh asked him to interpret his dreams, Joseph replied, “It is beyond my power to do this…but God can tell you what it means and set you at ease” (Genesis 41:16).

But. Three letters. One little word. One life instantly and dramatically changed. And millions of others impacted.

Now let’s rewind the story and imagine the scenario minus the word but. Put yourself in the palace as Pharaoh asks for Joseph’s help. This time, Joseph’s first thought is Who, me? I can’t do this! His heart pounds and his palms sweat. Finally he sputters, “It’s beyond my power to do this.” Bad move. He loses his head or lands back in prison with plenty of time for regret.

Thankfully, Joseph forged beyond “it is beyond my power to do this” and put his faith into practice. “It is beyond my power to do this, but God can tell you what it means,” he said. But moved him from prison to palace and gave him a position he’d never imagined.

The word but contains the same life-changing power for us today. It applies to our fear of inadequacy, but there are other scenarios, too:

  • “It’s beyond my power to forgive so-and-so for hurting me…but God can give me the grace necessary to let it go.”
  • “It’s beyond my power to give thanks for the heartache in my life…but God can enable me to do what He commands.”
  • “It’s beyond my power to face another day…but God can give me the strength I need.”

There it is. Three letters. One little word. One life instantly and dramatically changed. And who knows, but maybe millions of other lives impacted.

Here’s your assignment for the day. Fill in the blank. “It’s beyond my power to ____________. But God can __________________.”

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The Mighty Hero

Monday, April 27th, 2009

When I speak about the fear of inadequacy, I often refer to Moses as a prime Scriptural example. But move over, Moses! Make room for your friend Gideon. Judges 6 tells how Gideon was threshing grain in the winepress to avoid being caught by the marauding Midianites when the angel of the Lord appeared to him. “Mighty hero!” he said. “The Lord is with you!”

Mighty hero?

I wonder if Gideon did a double-take. In any case, the Lord then gave him a special mission: “Go with the strength you have and rescue Israel from the Midianites. I am sending you!”

I’ll bet our mighty hero did more than a simple double-take when he heard those words. Perhaps Gideon nearly choked before stammering, “But Lord, how can I rescue Israel? My clan is the weakest in the whole tribe of Manasseh, and I am the least in my entire family!”

Can you see his knees quake? Can you hear his voice tremble? The fear of inadequacy had nearly consumed our friend. Who me? I can’t do what You’re asking me to. I’m the least of the weakest. Please, choose someone else.

I love God’s simple response: “I will be with you. And you will destroy the Midianites as if you were fighting against one man.”

That’s the same promise God gave to Joshua and Moses, and more. “I will be with you. You don’t have to pretend to be someone you’re not. Just go in the strength you have and do what I’ve called you to do. I will be with you, and that’s all you need.”

Are you facing a God-given task or dream that looks utterly impossible? So impossible, in fact, that you hesitate even mentioning it to a friend lest you look like a lunatic? So impossible that you’ve brushed it off as a crazy thought, one that’s not worth pursuing lest you erase anyone’s doubts about your mental well-being or lack thereof?

If it’s God-breathed, then do it. Take the first step. Believe God for the impossible. Go ahead, be a mighty hero.

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“I’ll Go Where You Want Me to Go”

Thursday, April 2nd, 2009

Luke 9:57-62 remind me that being a disciple of Christ involves sacrifice. I remember, as a little girl, singing hymns of the faith with lyrics such as, “I’ll go where you want me to go, dear Lord…I’ll say what You want me to say…I’ll be what You want me to be…” and so on. Those words are so easy to sing, but when the moment comes to make such a commitment, they’re not so easy to put into practice.

What hinders us from following Christ wherever He leads, at whatever cost He asks? Fear is a major player, I believe. Fear of the unknown, fear of failure, fear of inadequacy. What about not wanting to give up personal comforts? How about the lack of passion for the lost?

There’s a spiritual battle going on around us, and it will be won as Christ’s followers learn to embrace sacrifice as a privilege rather than something to run from.

“God, grant me a willing heart to follow You wherever You lead, no matter the cost. You sacrificed Your life on my behalf, therefore no sacrifice I make for You is too great. Amen.”

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