How to Ease Stress Amid the Holiday Rush

The annual holiday rush has begun. Stores started displaying Christmas decorations weeks ago. The local Christian radio station is playing Christmas carols. And Black Friday sales are already here.

Maybe this busy season fans your creative flame. Decorating your home brings delight. Preparing festive foods brings satisfaction. Inviting others to share the holiday spirit with you brings joy. If so, bravo! Savor every moment and make many sweet memories.

But perhaps this season stokes embers of a different sort. The empty chair at the table is a stark reminder of your loss. A strained family relationship makes together-time awkward or impossible. Unmet expectations bring disappointment or frustration. And then there’s the stress of travel or hosting out-of-town guests for an extended time.

I don’t want to sound like a negative Nelly, but I do want you to know you’re not alone if thoughts of the holiday rush make your stress levels rise.

Martha felt stress too

Martha bustled about her kitchen like an ant on steroids as she prepared a hearty meal for Jesus and His disciples. Motivated by an honest desire to bless her guests with the best, she scurried to and fro while catching snippets of conversation happening in the adjoining room. (Luke 10:48-52)

A casual onlooker might have assumed everything in the kitchen was under control, but there was a problem: something besides dinner was simmering there.

Fixing this meal takes a lot of work, Martha fumed. I shouldn’t have to do this on my own. Mary should be helping me.

Before long, Martha’s attitude boiled over. Bursting into the room where her guests sat, she threw a scowl in Mary’s direction before turning to Jesus. “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!”

Yikes! Imagine the awkward silence that may have followed in those moments.

Jesus soothed Martha’s stress

Jesus knew how to calm storms, and this was no exception. 

“Martha, Martha,” He answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”

“Worried and upset about many things” nailed it. Martha’s to-do list made her brain spin. How would she ever get the meal ready in a reasonable amount of time? Would there be enough food to satisfy everyone? Would they like what she’d cooked?

Perhaps Jesus’s words helped bring clarity to Martha and why she felt so stressed. In a culture where people often ate from a common bowl, she’d chosen a menu with more variety. Her motivation to give the best to her guests was pure, but her choice was, perhaps, impractical given the time and energy it required to prepare several dishes.

Jesus didn’t berate Martha for the menu with words like, “Maybe you should have planned a bit better.” Nor did He shame her for her angry outburst with words like, “Whoa, woman! You’re ‘way out of line.” Rather, Jesus acknowledged Martha’s feelings and then reminded her that only one thing really mattered.

Focusing on what matters most amid the holiday rush

Can you relate to Martha? I can. It’s easy to become worried and upset about many things, especially during the holiday rush.

While our motivation to serve others is unquestionable, we get swept up in the details—decorations, food, parties, gifts, traditions—and we lose sight of what matters most. That’s when frustration and anxiety set in. So—what matters most, anyway? Jesus.

Martha’s sister Mary got it right. I’m not applauding her for not lending a hand in the kitchen, but I’m saying she knew the importance of focusing on Jesus and spending time in His presence.

Jesus is the One we celebrate. He’s the reason for this season, so let’s sit at His feet daily, even if only for a few minutes. Let’s keep Him foremost in our thoughts. Let’s seek to honor Him in all we do and say amid the busyness.

Making Jesus our focus brings calm to the holiday chaos, but taking a few practical steps helps too. Here are three suggestions to help soothe the stress we feel.

3 practical suggestions to soothe stress during the holiday rush

Simplify

Boat-life has taught me the joys of minimalism. For instance, my oven is too small to hold a turkey. I can stress over that, or I can bake a small ham or chicken in my crockpot. My fridge is too small to hold a bowl of salad prepared ahead of time, so I buy a pre-packaged salad to mix at the last minute. I don’t have the oven space to bake homemade rolls, so I buy them instead.

Simplifying how I do Christmas leaves me with the mental bandwidth to enjoy the day and the people around me. What’s one action step you can take to simplify this season?

Avoid comparison

It’s easy to fall into comparison during the holiday rush. For example, we look at other families who get along and wish ours could do the same. We see the pile of gifts under others’ trees and wish we could afford likewise. We hear about others who enjoy unique traditions and wish we could find something as creative and meaningful to celebrate. (Here’s an article with some fun ideas).

Comparison never serves a healthy purpose. Let’s avoid getting stuck in that trap and the negative emotions that follow by expressing thankfulness for what’s ours and rejoicing with others for what’s theirs.

Release expectations

Whether we realize it or not, we all have expectations about the holidays. For example, we might expect that our grown kids who live several hours away will come home to celebrate with us. But guess what? They make plans to stay home or visit the in-laws this year. Whaaat?

We have airline tickets reserved for a specific day on a specific flight. We expect to travel, but a blizzard changes everything. 

We expect to eat turkey dinner at 5 PM, but a power outage strikes an hour after we put the bird in the oven.

We expect a full house filled with laughter, but the stomach flu hits.

Time has taught me that life rarely goes according to expectations, so it’s best to release them. The unexpected will happen, so roll with it. Acknowledge your feelings but choose to adapt. Count it all joy, make concessions, and learn to smile even when things don’t roll as you thought they might. 

The holiday rush contains countless reasons for our stress levels to rise, but let’s choose a different response. Let’s simplify, avoid comparison, and release expectations. Above all, let’s stay focused on Jesus. Let’s celebrate Him, reflect Him to those around us, and honor Him in all we say and do this season.